The letter I never sent you, Mum
My dear Roomies,
Mothers and daughters relationships are NEVER easy. In fact, they are so complicated that no one has mastered it yet…
We fight, we love, we blame, we make up, we hurt , we laugh and we basically build an entire range of strong emotions and feelings with the woman who gave us LIFE.
Since we know how difficult and hard it is to actually speak to our mums and tell them how we really feel, we have decided here at 888ladies to give you a special platform for Mother’s Day 2009, that will allow you to write your mums a letter with a special thing that you’ve always wanted to tell her, but never had to courage to.
A special thank you, a special I love you mum, an angry letter, a blaming letter, an apology – ANYTHING that’s on your heart.
The most touching letter will win 5,000 LPs and all the others will win 1,000 LPs and great hugs!
Your ever loving,
The HappyHourFairy
30 comments
Id like to tell everyone here at 888 ladies i have a fantastic mom (jan49) she is the best, when i was younger 16 actually i got into a bad relationship with a bad lad and my mom thought she had lost me to him, i was very hard to deal with i told lies when i was with this person and put my mom through worry, i even ended up going to court because of this lad, he did a very bad thing with another person and because i was with him at the time i was expected to know all about what he and his mate had done, i had no idea at all, the police threatened i would go to jail if i didnt tell them what i knew, but i knew nothing at all, my moms life at this point was hell and it was all my fault, so i just want to say SORRY MOM i love you so much and i regret what i put you through back then, me and my mom are so close we are like sisters we tell each other everything from lifes little troubles to my sex life with my hubby lol, i had a few months of depression myself and was a wreck i was down the doctors 2-3 times a week i saw specialist’s after specialists thinking i had something wrong with me like the dreaded C word i must of been a nightmare for everyone, also last year i found a lump in my breast and everyone here at 888 ladies, my mom my family were brilliant i took everyones advice and went to see my GP luckily it turned out to just be a fatty lump, i was so scared, also she was abit upset when i split with my daughters dad but again she stood by me and help me through it, i was abit naughty as id met a man online who i had fallen deeply for and we had a tough ride to get where we are today and weve been together 6years in nov and were engaged,my mom adores him i think lol, he also plays on 888 ladies his kev39, me and my mom have had a rough 18months i lost my grandad (my moms dad) last august and then lost my nan (my moms mom) last november, me and my mom my daughter (whom im very close to also she is my life and starts high school this sept so im very anxios for her)and my hubby n dad all stayed strong and have pulled each other through it, my dad also had a scare last week when we thought he’d had an heart attack, he was in hospital for 4 days had lots of tests and thankfully all ok, so id just like to say THANKYOU MOM for everything you have taught me in life for standing by me in good/bad/tough/stressful times of my life you simply are the worlds best MOM and NAN and i love you very much xxxxxxxxxxxx
i sadly lost my mum two years ago and i wish i could tell her the things that i should have told her when she was alive.mums are the best thing in the world.we are taken for granted but we dont care as long as we know we are loved.yes sometimes tea isnt ready on time or we lose your favourite top but what the heck we know you still love us.my mum was always there when i needed her but i didnt appreciate the fact until she was gone.so on mothers day please all you sons and daughters just give mum a big hug thats thanks enough.and all we want xxxxxxxxx
and happy mothers day to all mums
my mum is my best friend. earlier this yr she had a cancer scare and i can honestly say i think i was more scared than her. selfishly i thought about how i would be able to cope without her. who would i call? who would listen to me moan? who would know what to say and when to say nothing? mum i know u will never see this but i love u more than i can ever say and i will always be there for both u and dad. i love u loads xxxx
i wish i had my mum here to tell her how amazing she was, and still is , she still has such a huge impact on my life and im totally lost without her, so much has happened since she has gone, but the biggest thing for me is having a beautiful baby girl that she never got to meet here ( but i feel she sent ) and im so honuored to be able to give my little girl a name after such a wonderful woman but im also extremely sad that she will never know the most warm hearted lady that is her name sake, my sister (lynda35) gave hollie (pamela) a present for her 3rd birthday in january where you actually get to name a star so we called it “nanny pam” so when i get her to look in the sky , nanny pam really is the brightest star up there sparkling bright for her and all of us to see, so heres to you mum the best in the world form your proudest daughter i love you to the stars and back xxxx
the hardest part in losing you was never looking in2 your eyes and telling you thank you for helping me so much .i was hard work very disruptive and bought you many worrying nights ,when i attempted suicide you was there to tell me off yet in your eyes i could finally see how much i had hurt you and i started to change my love for you grows so much each day and im so proud you are my mum everyday that passes brings me closer to you and to see your amazing smile again fills my heart with joy .you are an amazing mum and the best nanny pam in the world im proud of you mum and miss you so much and hope you see how much you are loved and missed .untill we meet again mum all my eternal love lyn xxxxxxx
Dear Mum,
I so wish you were talking to me, you don’t because of my son, god how I miss our chats and the laughs we used to share. I know you never had it easy, widowed at 32 when the father I never got to know was killed wen I was only ten months old. You did a fantastic job with us all even although sometimes we did stupid things, you were always there for us all, especially for me when i was in an abusive marriage, you always took me and my children in and were always there to pick up the pieces with never saying ” I told you so ” you were my strength in times when I just wanted to give up, you made me see I didnt have to live my life like that and that I could manage on my own with my children. I’ve made many mistakes in my life mum as you know, usually picking the wrong men, always the abusive ones, now though I have a wonderful man who loves me for me and is kind and good to me and my children although you don’t see this as you dont talk to me anymore, god how I wish you would I’m your daughter and I love you although I don’t say it often, I miss you more than you could possibly imagine and there isn’t a day goes by that I think of you and miss you. I was so hurt at xmas when I sent you your card and presents and you didn’t even acknowledge them and it was also very hurtful to me that I didn’t even get a christmas card from you, you know how much cards mean to me, I actully took last years card out from you and pretended you actually did send me one. Anyway no matter what mum I want you to know that I love you with all my heart and I know you are getting on in age and don’t keep very well I wish you would see me. my greatest fear is that something happens to you and we never made up, I pray we will and soon.
Love you so much mum please don’t push me away anymore, I so want to give you the biggest kiss and cuddle.
Hope you have a wonderful mother’s day with my sister and brothers just wish I could spen it with you all.
love, hugs and kisses always
your loving daughter
Helen
xxxxxxxxx
for my mum
mum your strength and understanding
has guided all your children through
really difficult times.
when we were young you always put us first.
you couped with three of us small, dad ill, and keeping us all fed clothed and loved.Then just as you were getting on your feet, us in high school dad back working you fell pregnant again but you never moaned that you had to start all over again, you just carried on loving us all , making us you world. typically of you just as you got the last one off to high school you took on looking after your granchildren so we could work and make our lives better. For most of your marriage dad had one illness after another but in the last 2yrs you looked after him with total devotion. Now he’s gone i just want to say mum its your turn to do what ever you want to make you happy because you deserve it and we all love you so much we will all get together this sunday( the first mothersday without dad) and i hope you will see how truly special you are to me.
love you mum.
to my mum,
mum there have been so many times i have wanted to thankyou for everything you have done for i have never forgotten, you have aways been there for me from day 1 when i first started secondary school when i got bullied to when i had my baby, if it wernt for u i would never have become the women i am today . when u got into a bad relationship i felt so bad like i couldnt help you untill i had the courage to stand up to him and put a stop to it all you have been put down by so many people and hurt by so many men well u dont need them mum cause u have me your bestfriend. you work looking after old and sick 9 hours a day and still have time to listen to my prolems and worrys, if it wernt for you i would still be that shy timid young girl i used to be. i am the proudest daughter in the world. when you had that stroke i cried my self to sleep because i didnt want to lose you, i want to say sorry for putting you through pain and worrry when i was a teenager hanging around with the wrong people and getting involved with drinking and nearly drugs and running away. you are my bestfriend and i hope we can be for plenty more years. tia is so lucky to have a nan like you . all my love mum and happy mothers day xxx amy xx
i wish i could of told you when i was young ,then my sisters would of not gone through it as well ,,,but mum i dont blame you, now his gone we can start anew and get to know each other again,, love you mum xx sharon xx
dear mum
I am writing this to thank you for everything you did to make me the person i am and the mum that i have become even though i always swore when i was a kid i woulod never be like you but i am more like you now then i have ever been but most of all even though you are gone from my life you are in my heart and i also want to thank you for the promise you gave me before you passed to heaven and that was that you would leave me a daughter to share my life with well you gave me 3 beautiful girls and 2 wonderful sons and i am so grateful to you i just wish i could say thank you in person but i know you are watching me and hearing me thank you every day
THANK YOU FOR JUST BEING YOU MUM
i wont be sending my mum a card this year, but still want theworld to know how much i love and respect her.she was my rock and best friend and has been for 47years, seeing methrough one disaster after another . always a smile or a hug at just the right time.sadly my brother died 5years ago aged 44 leaving 2 young children she has helped my sister-in-law cope yetnever got over her grief from that day she started to change,eventually 2years ago she was diagnosed with dementia aged 65.whether it was to do with losing my brother we,ll never know.so although i still have my dear sweet mum,we cant shop together anymore i cant take her tolunch,she doesn,t even know who i am anymore.i,ll visit and hold her hand while she sits inher own world.she was the core of mylife and i miss her so much.thanks mum happy mothers day xx
Mums, what’s that saying ‘cant live with them cant live without them.
Well mum thats me and you, i think we have been through it all over the years.
You left me on alone with our dad when I was 11, after he beat you, but what about me, why didnt you take me to! Life was unbearable, doing all the chores on top of school work ‘ to much salt’ he’d say and throw the dinner, then id have to start again.
Thats why I ran couldnt take it anymore, no one cared, no one looked.
I lived in that dingy lino floored room, with the werid landlord, creepy, scared and skint. Where were you! I didnt know then..
I managed to survive then found you again, could never ask you thr questions.
At least you found the love you didnt have before, the man i now call dad, wish you had found him earlier.
I love you to bits for both being there later in life when tessa left us, I could not have survived it without you.
I think it made me a better mother, showing my boys that i love them everyday, so I thank you for that to.
Now your older and ill and I cant ask the questions I should have asked a long time ago. May be now I should put it behind us, now you are the mum I wish I had had all those years ago.
I dont know what will happen in the future, but I love you lots and wouldnt have it any other way. Ill be there whenever you need me.
So Ill drive down this weekend as usual an take ya out for ya bingo!!!
We are like two peas in a pod, just make sure ya win this week !
Love you lots ad lots always
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx P
dear mum, I know you dont like hearing the truth as you are embarrassed and feel that it will all go away if we dont mention it. The thing is youre family are all that matters and as long as youve got us four you will be ok, dont feel embarrased there are alot of people out there who marry on a whim because they are vulnerable, or not thinking straight. You did want you thought was right at the time, ok it was wrong and he was a bad bad man but we are all here to make mistakes and no one should lead us or make us do something you dont want to do. The important thing is you followed your heart and it wasnt to be. Please come back home we are all waiting for you with open armsxxxx
hi to all the 888 ladies i got married in 1996 unfortunately the marriage wasnt a good one it was an abusive and controling relationship to the extreme where we moved out of the area and i wasnt to tell my family where i was going i lost touch with my mum for 5 yrs she didnt even know tat she had another granchild but thankfully the marriage broke down lol and i searched for my mum bu unfortunately i dint sucseed untill i heard she wa living in blackpool so i rung the blackpool council p and they told me that they had her on there system but unfortunately they couldnt give me her address but theysaid if i sent a letter to them they would forward it on for me so i did send the letter then to my amazement i got a phone call on my little sisters birthday and it was my mum she had recieved my letter as u can imagine it was tars all around my mum helped methrough my horrid divorce she was a tower of strength to me she met her third granchildmy sister met her nephew it was a wonderful time i moved to blackpool to be near her and we have eve been apart since we go shopping clubbing together i would jst like to say a big thankyou to my mum for all her support and love and kindness and tell her ill never lose her again thanks mum i love you so much xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
mum, you know you mean the world to me, you have stood by me through happy and sad times, i dont think you realise just how much i appreciate everything you have done for me espeially when i lost my little boy you where there for me 24 hours a day and would’nt leave my side you gave me strength to carry on and i have two other lovely children well not so young any more mum both at high school but you made me realise when i had my loss i also had my other to children to think about, and the strength you gave me and the love i will never forget, thankyou mum for your support and love you have given me all my life, I LOVE YOU LOADS XXX
Hi mum its been nearly 3 years since you were taken suddenly from my life I cant believe how quickly time has gone. I miss you loads the house is not the same without you around. Although I was nearly 36 years old and still living at home with you, I would never of changed it for the world you were my mum, my best friend, my confidante you were and still are my world. Your grandson Ben is turning into a great young gentleman and is doing extremely well at school and I am very proud of him. I am now married for the first time and Michael is a lovely gentlemen I am sure you would of liked him, although no man was good enough for me and Ben in your eyes. He thinks the world of Ben and me and looks after us both.
I am crying whilst writing this letter which I havent done for a long time.
I hope you are enjoying your rest and having a whale of a time with Dad wherever you may be, I love you both and always will.xxx
dear mum,
you are my best friend, you pick me up when i am down and make me smile in the darkest hours of the day. i have a big thank you.. just for you.
all my life you have cared for someone, first it was your dad, who you nursed until he died, then my dad, who we sadly lost to cancer 15 years ago, then you adopted three little monsters who i love dearly. now i find that you run around after me, my disability has taken its toll on me but you keep me ever so bright.
this mothers day comes with so much love from me to you, and a few special pressies too, i know you wont read this blog until monday so i can write it here lol. i have a theatre trip planned for you to see the buddy holly story, and i will look after the little or not so little monsters for you.
you are my number 1 mum, now and for always.
i love you xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Dear Mum,
Never once did i blame you. Not when i would wake up in the night to hear you screaming, nor every time you would cry for hours in your bedroom after he’d beaten you.
I remember one time, i was about 7 and he had you pinned down on the carpet, ripping your hair out chunk by chunk – me so helpless. And when he’s finally leave you alone, it was us you always comforted, never a thought for yourself.
I now understand the guilt you felt, the power he had over you and cannot even imagine the fear.
You would work nights until the early hours to support us, only to come home to be mentally and physically abused. Yet you stayed strong.
Even when we had no money, you would always take us out – to feed the ducks or to the seaside, some Mums wouldn’t have even bothered.
I may have only been young, but even then i admired your amazing inner strength.
But when he almost killed you when i was 9, you realised you just had to escape from his grip, and you did.
You never once gave up on me, even when i turned to drugs and theft in my teens – disobeyed you all the time and self harmed. I could see it almost broke you to see me so low, and i know you felt guilt over what happened in the past.
But he chose to hurt us Mum, and now we are stronger than ever, we have overcome so much the past few years.
I now am free of drugs, and work in a bank – and to hear you say you are proud of me it’s the best feeling in the world.
And you know why? Because i could never have done it without you.
I love you Mummy xxxxxxxxxxx
Dear mum,
I just want to thank you for being the most important and influential person in my life. You are my rock and you have shaped the person that I am today. Your love and guidance through the last 21 years has paid dividends and I cannot express just in a few words exactly how much I love and respect you! You have been there through all the times I didnt think i’d get through and you’ve pulled me out at the other end. When I was abused as a child, or when I got myself pregnant at the age of 15. You are so strong and beautiful and a huge inspiration! My only hope is that every single person knows how it feels to have a mother the way that I have you! I love you. Forever and Always xxxxxxxx
Dear Mum, After 35 yrs I still miss you, not a day goes by that I dont think of you or ask you a question,mum. Even though i had you mum for 19 years before you died,and you were the best.I would have loved to know the person.I knew the mother, the wife, the daughter of nan and grandad. I would never know the woman,that would have come in time mum, time we have not had.what would you have thought of me now mum with children, grandchildren of my own, they would have adored you mum.They ask about you, you know.I tell them gran was the best of the best,I could do no wrong mum could! I even though I know i was a nightmare for you at times.I wonder what you would have made of things now mum online bingo, you loved your bingo mum it would have been bliss for you.perhaps we will get to know each other mum, oh I hope there is a heaven mum. We can sit and chat over a cuppa, another of your loves you did love your tea,I will get to know the woman ,you will get to know the woman in me.
Ill love you mum for ever,Godbless, Valxxxx
To mum,
You showed me the ways of the world, you been they for me, made me laugh, made me cry. The way you know all i want you to do is listen.
I enjoy all the time we have together and hope nothing will ever tear us apart. So i thank you for doing the best in raising me… and thankyou for the 2 brothers you gave me.
i love you xx
My Darling Mum. There is just one question I would like to ask you.Why did you leave us all.I was only six at the time.I went to school and when I came home you had gone.Since that day Mum, I have never had a card or a letter from you.You took my heart with you when you left.I tried all ways to find you,but it was as if you had left the planet.If I could see you once more,I would tell you I never stopped loving you,and you have two adorable grandchildren.Where ever you are Mum,I love you and I miss you very much.
I love you Mum and always will xxxxxx
dear mum, i dont have enough words to thank you for all you have done for me.both you and dad were there for me when my marriage broke up and i cried a million tears on your shoulder. when i went a bit mental and got in loads of debt it you who bailed me out. you were always there with hug ,a joke or even just a place to go when i was at my lowest.
but i only realised just how strong you were when my beloved dad died last year, i felt my whole world was ending ,my divorce came through the same day as the funeral but you were still there for me.youd lost your partner of over 45 years and you were still asking us girls “are you ok”
your still going strong today and there in every way we need you we love you mum and always will xxxxx
Hi Mum
I wish so much that you were here so i could spend Mothers Day with you. It’s been 3 years since you died and when you went you took the heart of me with you. We always had such a close bond, we could talk about anything and everything. Even though you had 4 children it was always you and i. When i took ill at 14 and ended up having 14 operations you were always the first face i saw when i came round. Then Dad died, the only man you had been with and loved, we clung to each other. The rest were all married and had kids. Then when i was 24 and i had to have hysterectomy it broke your heart more than mine cos u knew i always wanted a child. You were there to hold me when i cried or you calmed me down when i was angry. Even when i took it out on you, you just held me and told me everything would be ok and that you loved me. When you got cancer, i got told first by your Dr and then phoned Cathy at work, i was a wreck but couldn’t let you know. Even though it 10am, we picked Cathy up from work, went to her house and she poured me a large vodka, she then phoned the others. They all decided that it was best not to tell you but it was so hard for me cos i was the one who saw you every day and looked after you. When you found out you were so strong, i fell apart when the specialist told you but you told me everything would be ok, you ended up comforting me. You were never a dog lover and when i got Leo you were dubious and wary but eventually whenever i brought him to your house i would wonder why he would stay at your feet with his face on your knee, then i found out you had been feeding him ginger nuts. You fell in love with him mainly cos you knew he was the only baby i would have. When the cancer spread it was horrific. I remember the first time i had to bath you, i’m so sorry mum but i cried after it, thinking it must have been so demeaning for you. I spoke to my sisters and cried to them and they said they would help out more but whenever it came to bathing you, you wouldn’t let anyone else but me do it. The one thing that stays with me is just before you died, you kept saying how i had been born dead but was brought back to life and because i couldn’t have children you blamed yourself, you thought you must have done something wrong while you were pregnant with me.You kept saying that. Mum you loved me and you were always there for me but now you have my baby with you. I cry every day for you, dad and my baby. I feel so lost and empty. I would give anything just to have you put your arms around me and hear once again, everything is going to be ok. I love you mum and miss you so much. Look after my precious baby. Linda XXXXXXX
To mum
I have always wanted to say i love you so much and i am sorry 4 what i have done to hurt you but i realy wont to see you again i no i have hurt u and very upset u i just wont u to understand i am sorry and i just wont a big hug off my mum again at this hard time off my life as it is my son’s 1st ann on the 28th and will need t 2 be with me xx i love u mum x i just hope you 4 give me xx
message to mum i wish i had u for my own but all i have is pictures for u are far away my world is sad and empty i sit each night and cry but i will love u always untill THE DAY I DIE
Dear Mum
Over the last few years if it was not for you i dont know what i would have done.
You have been there when i lost all my babies through miscarriage, you gave me the love and spport i needed, you were there for the birth of your granddaughter and have her ever chance you can.
I cant express the help and support you have given me when i was diagnosed with a form of motor nurone and we spend as much time together as we can as you know that i will go before you but you always put on a brave face and hope they come up with a miracle cure.
I just want to say i love you and always will even when i am an angel in heaven as you always said i was your angel.
All my love always
Angie
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thank you very much agent for choosing us xxxxx
my mum is the coolest mum she is always there for me and we have the funnest times together cuz i am getting older i hope nothing ever tears us appart. she always tells me whats on her mind and i tell her stuff what is worring me..i am only 12 neally a teenager..i love my mum..shes the coolest mum and i am glad shes my mum.
my mum is honest , truthfull, thoughtfull and a lovely person she works with old people in a nursing home. i am a very lucky person to have a mum like this..
thanks mum
i love you
maddy
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